punkbread:

*cant take a good selfie* *entire day is ruined*

(via trust)

bruhcardi:

when u take off ur iphone case and it feels like ur holding a newborn

(Source: okuyasue, via trust)

rowanandphoenixfeather:

one of my roommates used to work with 5th graders in a creative writing class thing and they had to write a romance and most of the kids wrote stories about princesses and crap but this one little girl wrote about how a marshmallow fell in love with a mug of cocoa and he loved the cocoa so much that in order to be with her he melted and died like wow kid that’s some shakespearian shit right there

(via astound)

burgerkid:

operator: hello 911, whats your emergency?

me: my wifi isnt working

(via astound)

(Source: yum5sauceyum, via astound)

no not all girls take 5 hours to get ready. no not because i want to talk about something sensitive does it mean im menstruating. no not all girls say cute every 2 seconds in a gretchen weiner voice. no maybe the reason i call myself ugly is because i have actually issues with my physical appearance, not because im searching for attention. im so over people generalizing and stereotyping girls jesus fucking christ.

(Source: lllamasita, via trust)

42hearts:

there’s nothing worse than getting told you’re bad at the only thing you’re good at

(via trust)

This annoys me

This annoys me

(Source: efedra, via recycledanger)

(Source: softwaring, via recycledanger)

Me: *makes self marginally smaller bowl of pasta than usual*
Me: dieting isn't so bad